Seaside

 I'd been talking a lot with my friend, call her as Sea.

a picture of Sea, taken on 29/03/21.

Don't ask me how I talk to, I just love doing random things so yeah, we decided to have a random ride at night. Yes at night, it was around 11.30 pm probably? Uhm, no. I won't talk about the night we had but the talking we had lol

As I wrote on my writing before, people would probably feel so easy to say "no", but me? Yes you know the answer already. If you think I'm not trying to do so, you're wrong. I don't know sometimes I feel like I'm too kind for "them" but please get me wrong cause I'm just joking lol. Well, I wish I could say so....

I told my friend, Sea, about this. What's surprised me? Yeps, she felt the same way as me. It sounds clichè but, I feel like I found someone who was on the same boat with me?? Not such a bad fortune but, we have same thoughts of saying "no" is such a hard thing to do lol. Well, I can definitely say No, especially to the people I thought they would make things more difficult. But when it turns into someone who helped me a lot, and always be there for me, dude, really I can't. Like, you know, they call it as "bucin" which means like a lovebird? I didn't mean bucin as that, but, yeah you know what I mean, right?

It's kinda usual for me going by myself, do some culinary, go on theater, by myself. Uhm, the reason? First, I want to be alone. Second, I'm not brave enough to ask someone to go with me? Yups, call me weird but, I don't know why when I want to ask someone to go with, it will always come with a thought like "is she ok to go with me?" "Does she like the spot or no?" "Does she talk about me behind if she doesnt like the spot?" and something like that? I think it's better if I don't ask them at all and end up being alone though there would be a moment like I want to go with my friends but I have none to ask lol.

You all might say, "dude you're such an overthinker". But in fact, there so much things I shouldn't think about but they come up in my mind like in a sudden?? You know, I say a lot of things before I did what they asked me, but I kept doing it like I did it with my whole heart? Uhm, anyway I don't know what I'm talking about, but, last thing I say, at least we did good things, Sea.